Temporary Title

A Letter Written by Tyler Molander, A Student at Umass

Hello,

I’m pissed off at this campus. There is no way for me to get you to understand what I’m really talking about in a page of text. There is no real way to get you to care. Someone will always be freaked out by a note getting shoved under their door, someone will always jump to conclusions, someone will always be busy, and someone will always just throw this letter away without even opening it. So please, just stop and think for one quick minute.

This is what I want to have: a group of friends that do not need to rely on common interests or activities in order to foster friendship, love, and new experiences. What I mean by this is that I don’t want friends solely based on video games, having the same taste in movies, getting drunk on a Friday night, smoking pot or doing other drugs because we’re too lazy to think of anything else, or talking for the sake of talking. I want to do new things, real things… and I don’t want to do them alone.

So, my best friend and I are going to wait in the Blue Wall every day next week (1/30-2/3) from 6pm-7pm or so. I do not want to drink, play video games, make small talk, etc. I do not want to be a means to an end. I want to create things to do on campus, and I want to create with you. I am aware that I may seem stupid, desperate, boring, or whatever negative things you wish to think of me. But the truth is that I am stupid, desperate, and boring and want to change. Call me crazy, but I don’t want to do stupid shit anymore. People can change, but most are lazy. I want to find the people who can understand this, but this school is way too big and I will never have the opportunity to meet everyone. So, I wrote you a letter to tell you that I am here.

I’m proof that at least one person is frustrated that this school is not providing an acceptable social atmosphere. So let’s make it. If you want to do real things at this school, try to be an empathetic human being, and don’t just want more people for your friend collection, please come to the Blue Wall or email us. If you want to talk about everyone else, not yourself, this is the place for you. I want people who I can grow with, who I can create with, who I can be human with, who I can feel real feelings with, who I can love, who are real. Time is short and I’m tired of waiting. If you have felt anything while reading this, please contact me - Not for yourself, but because you know that’s what should happen. Cut the shit, human up, and make time. Even if you don’t like me, there will at least be one other person there to talk to. So think about it, that’s all I ask.

Look for the Green Frog. Regardless of anything I’ve said here: If you want a friend in any form, please contact us: Umassfriendclub@gmail.com. I’m afraid too.

Remember that I love you,

Tyler Molander

Please don’t come if you are acquainted with me, I apologize, but just trust me.

He was living in Southwest. He wrote this letter earlier this week and slid copies of it under the doors of strangers’ rooms in order to form a “friends club.” 

Several of the people who received the letter called the police and the administration got involved. He was put through a mental analysis, was told that someone threatened to “bash [him] over the head with a beer bottle,” and had to spend a night in a safe house. And today The Daily Collegian reported that he has withdrawn from the university, possibly under pressure from his peers and from the administration.

While this letter contains some awkward phrasing and word choice, I really see no reason for the response that this letter has drawn. It seems to be an honest attempt to create a change in the social structure of this university written by someone who has had trouble relating to the people around him. I for one can certainly relate to his feeling that most of the relationships that are formed on this campus are based on one common interest and rarely extend much further than that interest (video games, sports, movies, drinking, etc.)

I’ve been feeling much the same way since coming back from winter break, so this news is especially poignant for me. I am sincerely sad that Tyler Molander has decided to withdraw, and I really wish that I had gotten a chance to meet him.